Title: Books On A Boat, 30 July

Okay, so my wife belongs to a book club. I never understood book clubs. Seems to be a woman thing as near as I can figure. The only film I've ever seen about book clubs, the Jane Austen Book Club, all the subscribers were women. Alright, yeah they let a guy in, but that wouldn't happen in real life. No, I'm sure that was for sexual tension. Gotta have sexual tension in a movie or no one will go ya know. Wasn't a bad movie, they all admired Jane so much, and the film's premise was all about how the various women's lives somehow dovetailed into the various books of Ms. Austen. But, ah-lass and wouldn't you guess, none of them ended up like Jane...dare I say an Old Maid? (Probably shouldn't, but I did, First Amendment and all) No, by the end of the book they were all hooked up with..of all things, hmph...men.

Any rate, still don't understand book clubs, or women for that matter. I like both women and books though. But I like to read what I like to read when I like to read it. These women recently read a book about a vampire meant for 15-year old girls, and why? Well because one of their daughters wanted her Mom to read it so the Mom got to choose 'cause it was her turn to host, and so all the women got to pretend they were 15 again. I don't think it worked, but I'm told it was a fast read. I tried to be thirty about a week ago, and that didn't work either.

So, it's Barbie's turn to host. And, because we have this boat that is soooo expensive to own, we try use it for everything we can and get the rides down to maybe $20 bucks a voyage. Have you noticed I get distracted? Drives everyone I know nuts. Back to boats or was it books? So we have books on a boat, no wonder I'm abstracted. Another thing about book clubs, everyone seems to think it's a great idea and then you can never get all of them to come to a book meet. Oh, they've got all kinds of excuses but I think there is really only one, THEY DIDN'T READ the BOOK! Fine with me, I don't care. If I'm gonna read about vampires though, I'm gonna read about nonfictional ones, Nosferatu, or Bram Stoker's. Bleah! Hello dare, allow me to intrrro-duce myself, yeess, my name-is Count Draaaacula. eh, eh. Count, von, two, tree...eh, eh.

I said everyone never shows up. (and I ain't never did no wrong) No exception today. Only half show, maybe there's seven or eight of them? So four to go...on a boat ride. But to make it look like a full boat, they allowed three men to tag along. The driver-me, my brother and his boy, my nephew. July 29th, and look how they're dressed. Man, summer didn't really come 'til September. But we were going to have a good time anyway (dammit) on the lake this year, and so we did. Here's two book club members, (Barb and sister-in-law Lizette) and a man (non-member).
So we see three of the book club members here, Willie, Rachelle and host Barbara. They are trying to pretend that it is a real book club by looking at, well.. a book. Must be fiction. Barb is reading the back cover, Willie's a little further along on page 27. Hard to tell where Rachelle's, at, she's all over the place. What the heck do you suppose is in those red cups? Perhaps a little bit of sugar. How novel.

Phew, that scanning was hard work. Book clubbers meeting over already? Perhaps they are on a sugar high.
Ah, the back of the book brings a quizzical look on the face of one member and a hardy laugh on the other. Yup, reading all gone. Seems as though they are resting on their laurels.
Nephew Alex is curious about Willie's umbrella. It's not raining, you can tell that it's not hot from the sun can't we? Could she be from New Orleans? Perhaps, or maybe Alabama, or Mississippi. If so, she must be feeling somewhat at home, as the river she is on would eventually meander by Mississippi and New Orleans. So she feels at home on the Father of Waters, the Big Muddy, and Willie, Willie, Willie won't...go home.
Here is a person who has never driven a boat. She is so easy to please. Wanna drive the boat Rachelle? How old is she? Comfortable though, got behind the wheel and floored it. Wasn't intimidated at all. Maybe the sugar rush.
Ebony and Ivory. Willie and Barbara. Good friends and co-workers. A splendid time was had by all. Memories abound as we pull into a dock the length of a football field. But hey, that's Life on the Mississippi. Yup, Old Man River. What better place to be inspired to read a book, or even write a book, perhaps The Great American Novel? Mark my word, Samuel Clemens would be proud.